Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Back soon
I have lots of updates stewing, but lack of time to post. In the meantime, dear reader from Watervliet, please say hello. Do tell how your town got that name too!
Friday, July 2, 2010
Oblivion
I'm sure we all know "those people." The kind that do something that everyone else notices, yet they are totally oblivious. B was my second blind date from Craigslist. The first was a kind lawyer, but he had one glaring fault. He was a spit sprayer. We weren't sitting particularly close since we were on a first date, but repeatedly my face got wet while he was talking. I can't imagine that no one had ever told him that it was disgusting to be spit on when someone was talking to you. He just seemed clueless that he was even doing it. Needless to say, that squashed any chance of a second date (and he was fairly boring to boot).
There are also those kind of people that never take fault for their role in anything. There is a woman at work like that. I've been warned never to work with her because she always blames someone else for her screw-ups, even if is painfully clear that she was the instigator of the problem. She is well-known for making other work staff cry. I find it hard to believe she doesn't know about her reputation, but she either doesn't care or (wait for it), blames it on others.
Finally, there are those people that love to create drama where there is none. I'm not sure if their lives are boring or what, but it can be exhausting. When I sold my house in NY, the buyer was overly dramatic. She threatened to pull out of the deal ON.THE.DAY.OF.CLOSING because she noticed a missing window lock (that had been missing all along). It was this huge drama, which I easily settled by going to Home Depot and spending a whopping 45 cents for a new lock. I screwed it in in about 30 seconds. Was she even aware of how silly she looked over a 45 cent lock?
Maybe we all need to remember that it is helpful to step outside of ourselves often, and see how things appear to others. Maybe the spitter would keep his fluids to himself. Maybe the mean co-worker would realize she's hurting herself and others, and she would choose to be more kind. Maybe the buyer of my house would realize that 45 cents isn't worth causing 2 realtors to get in an uproar about losing a deal. Maybe my in-laws would realize that judging B based on my words is ridiculous, and it isn't helping to mend any fences - in fact it is creating irreparable gaping holes in the fence (hello - I know you're all reading). Maybe not being oblivious to several honest, heartfelt conversations would be a great start.
One can only hope. And, almost 5 years later, I do wonder if the spitter has ever found a woman. He told me on that date that NONE of the men in his family with an advanced degree were married. Of course, I couldn't help but wonder if they were a family of spitters :)
There are also those kind of people that never take fault for their role in anything. There is a woman at work like that. I've been warned never to work with her because she always blames someone else for her screw-ups, even if is painfully clear that she was the instigator of the problem. She is well-known for making other work staff cry. I find it hard to believe she doesn't know about her reputation, but she either doesn't care or (wait for it), blames it on others.
Finally, there are those people that love to create drama where there is none. I'm not sure if their lives are boring or what, but it can be exhausting. When I sold my house in NY, the buyer was overly dramatic. She threatened to pull out of the deal ON.THE.DAY.OF.CLOSING because she noticed a missing window lock (that had been missing all along). It was this huge drama, which I easily settled by going to Home Depot and spending a whopping 45 cents for a new lock. I screwed it in in about 30 seconds. Was she even aware of how silly she looked over a 45 cent lock?
Maybe we all need to remember that it is helpful to step outside of ourselves often, and see how things appear to others. Maybe the spitter would keep his fluids to himself. Maybe the mean co-worker would realize she's hurting herself and others, and she would choose to be more kind. Maybe the buyer of my house would realize that 45 cents isn't worth causing 2 realtors to get in an uproar about losing a deal. Maybe my in-laws would realize that judging B based on my words is ridiculous, and it isn't helping to mend any fences - in fact it is creating irreparable gaping holes in the fence (hello - I know you're all reading). Maybe not being oblivious to several honest, heartfelt conversations would be a great start.
One can only hope. And, almost 5 years later, I do wonder if the spitter has ever found a woman. He told me on that date that NONE of the men in his family with an advanced degree were married. Of course, I couldn't help but wonder if they were a family of spitters :)
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Simplify
Recently B told me his motto right now is "simplify." I love how that reflects our lives right now. Ways we are working to simplify:
- We sold our house! I commute an hour each way which isn't simple in any way. It is very stressful to sit in traffic for 2 hours each day.
- We're downsizing. Sure, 2300sq ft is nice, but why do 2 people need that much space? We spend so much of our free time cleaning rooms we don't even use. 2 people do not need 4 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms.
- Our new place is 1,100sq ft, 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms. We're going to have to purge some of our stuff, but it fits nicely with the simplify motto.
- B was working a job that is 4 shifts per week, but never the same 4 days. Every other weekend he worked, plus the drama there was through the roof. Starting Tuesday he's starting a new job that is a normal M-F 8-5 nursing job. To say we're excited to have more time together is an understatement.
- B's new job is NINE BLOCKS from our new apartment. My job is 2.2 miles. Those two things scream "simplify." We'll be downsizing to one car. Who needs 2 cars when we can both bike/walk to work?
- Family drama was a huge stressor in the past year. B has made the conscious decision to not participate in it any more. At a certain level you have to let things go, especially when you've tried everything possible and things don't get better. That simplification has made a HUGE difference in our quality of life. It's been interesting to watch what happens when you refuse to feed into the drama.
- Making an effort to let work stress go. My job can be very stressful, but by no means is it life and death. I have to constantly remind myself that the world isn't going to end if I need an extra day to do something. Life is about enjoying the rare sunny evening, not working late to get that important-but-not-really-important work task done.
What's mostly amazing to me is that the effort to simplify really came together all within the last week. B was offered the new job, we got an offer on our house, and we found a fantastic, new, urban apartment. I'm looking forward to our new way of life.
- We sold our house! I commute an hour each way which isn't simple in any way. It is very stressful to sit in traffic for 2 hours each day.
- We're downsizing. Sure, 2300sq ft is nice, but why do 2 people need that much space? We spend so much of our free time cleaning rooms we don't even use. 2 people do not need 4 bedrooms and 3 bathrooms.
- Our new place is 1,100sq ft, 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms. We're going to have to purge some of our stuff, but it fits nicely with the simplify motto.
- B was working a job that is 4 shifts per week, but never the same 4 days. Every other weekend he worked, plus the drama there was through the roof. Starting Tuesday he's starting a new job that is a normal M-F 8-5 nursing job. To say we're excited to have more time together is an understatement.
- B's new job is NINE BLOCKS from our new apartment. My job is 2.2 miles. Those two things scream "simplify." We'll be downsizing to one car. Who needs 2 cars when we can both bike/walk to work?
- Family drama was a huge stressor in the past year. B has made the conscious decision to not participate in it any more. At a certain level you have to let things go, especially when you've tried everything possible and things don't get better. That simplification has made a HUGE difference in our quality of life. It's been interesting to watch what happens when you refuse to feed into the drama.
- Making an effort to let work stress go. My job can be very stressful, but by no means is it life and death. I have to constantly remind myself that the world isn't going to end if I need an extra day to do something. Life is about enjoying the rare sunny evening, not working late to get that important-but-not-really-important work task done.
What's mostly amazing to me is that the effort to simplify really came together all within the last week. B was offered the new job, we got an offer on our house, and we found a fantastic, new, urban apartment. I'm looking forward to our new way of life.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Turning 29
My 29th birthday was Friday, and what a weekend! So much to write about.
Most notably, we got an offer on the house. It was a disappointing $20k less than our asking price. We decided we're okay walking away without our down payment, so we countered at $5k more than what they offered. They have until tomorrow at noon to respond, so keep your fingers crossed.
Most of my birthday day was spent at a super boring conference for work. I skipped the last session and was happy to discover B had also gotten off of work early. He's not a fan of berry picking, but since he knew I loved it he took me to a local farm to pick some hood strawberries. Yum! The day was beautiful and sunny, and it was nice to spend some time together outside.
On Sunday (today) I turned those berries into some awesome freezer jam. I love making freezer jam because it is SO easy.
First you wash, de-stem, and mash your berries.
Next you heat the pectin, sugar, and water.
Then add the mash to the pectin/sugar mix.
Stir.
Put in freezable containers.
That's it! In less than an hour you have quite a bit of jam. For us this lasts most of the winter. It's delicious and I love knowing that we made jam from berries that we picked.
Saturday night we went to the local balloon festival. At night they light up 6 hot air balloons and there is a festival with food, a live band, rides, and random booths. It was nice because we rode our bikes there and enjoyed the summer weather. Sorry for the blurry shots - night photos are a challenge!
This weekend also included dessert out with my family, a trip to the spa with my mom (heavenly), and finding an apartment we love if we get good news tomorrow. I also helped out at the cat shelter for their annual kitten adoption event. 54 cats and kittens found new homes! All in all, it was a fantastic weekend and a very nice start to 29.
Most notably, we got an offer on the house. It was a disappointing $20k less than our asking price. We decided we're okay walking away without our down payment, so we countered at $5k more than what they offered. They have until tomorrow at noon to respond, so keep your fingers crossed.
Most of my birthday day was spent at a super boring conference for work. I skipped the last session and was happy to discover B had also gotten off of work early. He's not a fan of berry picking, but since he knew I loved it he took me to a local farm to pick some hood strawberries. Yum! The day was beautiful and sunny, and it was nice to spend some time together outside.
On Sunday (today) I turned those berries into some awesome freezer jam. I love making freezer jam because it is SO easy.
First you wash, de-stem, and mash your berries.
Next you heat the pectin, sugar, and water.
Then add the mash to the pectin/sugar mix.
Stir.
Put in freezable containers.
That's it! In less than an hour you have quite a bit of jam. For us this lasts most of the winter. It's delicious and I love knowing that we made jam from berries that we picked.
Saturday night we went to the local balloon festival. At night they light up 6 hot air balloons and there is a festival with food, a live band, rides, and random booths. It was nice because we rode our bikes there and enjoyed the summer weather. Sorry for the blurry shots - night photos are a challenge!
This weekend also included dessert out with my family, a trip to the spa with my mom (heavenly), and finding an apartment we love if we get good news tomorrow. I also helped out at the cat shelter for their annual kitten adoption event. 54 cats and kittens found new homes! All in all, it was a fantastic weekend and a very nice start to 29.
Friday, June 18, 2010
Favorite time of day
Some people love 5pm, when the work horn sounds and they are free to spend the evening as they choose. Some people love 5am, rising with the sun, and heading off to a morning exercise people. Some people love the 15 minutes in the morning with a freshly poured cup of coffee and the morning newspaper.
My favorite time is none of those (although all but 5am are nice times for me). My favorite time of the day is 6:12am. Exactly. That's the time the alarm goes off, waking us up with whatever happens to be on the radio at that time. (aside: damn the mornings when it is that really annoying Quizno's jingle that makes the hair on your arm stand on end).
I'm not a morning person at all, but at 6:12am, my husband sleepily pushes the snooze button, moves all the pillows out from the middle of the bed (we both like snuggle pillows), scoots towards me in our divine king-sized bed, and puts his arms around me nice and tight. For the next 10 glorious minutes I'm engulfed in his arms, remembering on our first date how I loved that he was a great hugger. I feel safe, loved, warm, and often fall back asleep for a few minutes. It is absolutely the highlight of my day. Sometimes it's just the little things.
When is your favorite time of day?
My favorite time is none of those (although all but 5am are nice times for me). My favorite time of the day is 6:12am. Exactly. That's the time the alarm goes off, waking us up with whatever happens to be on the radio at that time. (aside: damn the mornings when it is that really annoying Quizno's jingle that makes the hair on your arm stand on end).
I'm not a morning person at all, but at 6:12am, my husband sleepily pushes the snooze button, moves all the pillows out from the middle of the bed (we both like snuggle pillows), scoots towards me in our divine king-sized bed, and puts his arms around me nice and tight. For the next 10 glorious minutes I'm engulfed in his arms, remembering on our first date how I loved that he was a great hugger. I feel safe, loved, warm, and often fall back asleep for a few minutes. It is absolutely the highlight of my day. Sometimes it's just the little things.
When is your favorite time of day?
Monday, June 14, 2010
Sometimes you have to make a decision to know it's the wrong one
In September 2009, after a grueling year of off and on looking, we finally bought a house. After all, that's the American dream, right? We were convinced this was our dream house that we'd live in for many, many years. It was a house we never thought we could afford, but it was bank owned and we were able to buy it within our budget. Granite countertops! Kitchen island! Soaking tub! Double sinks! We were thrilled.
In November 2009 I ended up leaving my job if the past 6 years for a new opportunity. This new job is 16.4 miles from our beautiful house. While that may not be far for many of you, that's an eternity away when you live in a city with traffic. The commute is an hour plus each way, making me feel like those people in L.A. that I always laughed at. "Why would anyone in their right mind spend 2 hours a day in their car?" My record commute one unpredicted snowy day (with only about an inch of snow) was just over 4 hours. Yes, FOUR hours. The breaking point was a day about 2 months ago where I hit the one hour mark of driving far from our house and started to cry. I cried the rest of the way home. We had a long conversation that night and decided to sell the house.
While the commute is a huge factor (and I love my job and it's a steady one that I can have for all of eternity if I want to), we also realized that owning isn't important to us. While it's touted as this awesome thing, it isn't really. Our mortgage plus utilities is more than twice what we were paying for rent. We are very lucky that our house is new and has no yard, so we spend very little time working on the house. We do spend so much time cleaning the 2,300 square feet (and we only live in about 1,300 of it). The "tax benefits" were non-existant for us, and although people are always say that you're gaining equity, that doesn't really happen for years. Of the $2,000ish that we pay, a whopping $300 goes to principal. The rest is interest and taxes.
So the house is on the market (first realtor just fired) and we're looking forward to going back to renting whenever we can sell. We are looking to move into trendier areas of town with easy walking/biking to local restaurants and shops. The burbs are nice, but we're young(ish), kid-free, and ready to be urbanites for awhile. I completely understand why some people like to own, but we're happily going back to the rental life.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Time to build an ark
There was an article in our local paper on Monday that I'll summarize to save you the reading:
- 1.48 inches of rain Sunday, which is more than the usual monthly total
- That rain brought us to 3.09 inches for the month (and it was only June 7)
- 3.09 inches was the 4th rainiest June in history
- By June 7 we had a new record for May+June rain (May was 3rd wettest in history)
- April had 25 days of rain, for a total of 52/67 days with rain since April 1
Today is Thursday. We've added 3 more days of rain since Monday, and it's now the 3rd wettest in history. (EDIT: 2 hours after I posted this we cracked into the top two) We also just set a record today for the latest date in the year to have not had a day 80 degrees or hotter.
Now all this weather is a bummer, don't get me wrong. However, I'm a native. My brain and body are wired for grey skies and drizzle (a term that I've learned is new to many who aren't from here - that and "spendy"). I don't mind a long stretch of rain because it makes things green and makes the world smell wonderfully. Sure, I'm ready for sun now, but we had a very mild winter, so I'm okay paying my dues.
On the flip side, B is a native of South Florida. The land of sunshine, beaches, and flip flops and shorts at Christmas. He distinctly remembers the ONE time they had a "frost warning" because the entire area panicked. He moved to Portland before we met, but I know he'd be long gone if it weren't for me. The grey is really hard on him. The endless days of no sun and copious amounts of rain are soul-crushing for him. The witty, sarcastic, silly man I love disappears when the rain stretches more than a few days. We were able to get away to Vegas and get some sun in May, which was great, but it has rained almost every day since we've been back. I've promised that we won't be here forever (more than 5 more years), but since my family is here and I really like my job, we're stuck here for now.
Lest this post be too depressing, check out the 7 day forecast. My soul is singing.
- 1.48 inches of rain Sunday, which is more than the usual monthly total
- That rain brought us to 3.09 inches for the month (and it was only June 7)
- 3.09 inches was the 4th rainiest June in history
- By June 7 we had a new record for May+June rain (May was 3rd wettest in history)
- April had 25 days of rain, for a total of 52/67 days with rain since April 1
Today is Thursday. We've added 3 more days of rain since Monday, and it's now the 3rd wettest in history. (EDIT: 2 hours after I posted this we cracked into the top two) We also just set a record today for the latest date in the year to have not had a day 80 degrees or hotter.
Now all this weather is a bummer, don't get me wrong. However, I'm a native. My brain and body are wired for grey skies and drizzle (a term that I've learned is new to many who aren't from here - that and "spendy"). I don't mind a long stretch of rain because it makes things green and makes the world smell wonderfully. Sure, I'm ready for sun now, but we had a very mild winter, so I'm okay paying my dues.
On the flip side, B is a native of South Florida. The land of sunshine, beaches, and flip flops and shorts at Christmas. He distinctly remembers the ONE time they had a "frost warning" because the entire area panicked. He moved to Portland before we met, but I know he'd be long gone if it weren't for me. The grey is really hard on him. The endless days of no sun and copious amounts of rain are soul-crushing for him. The witty, sarcastic, silly man I love disappears when the rain stretches more than a few days. We were able to get away to Vegas and get some sun in May, which was great, but it has rained almost every day since we've been back. I've promised that we won't be here forever (more than 5 more years), but since my family is here and I really like my job, we're stuck here for now.
Lest this post be too depressing, check out the 7 day forecast. My soul is singing.
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